


Science Made Us Do It

by strangeallure



Category: CW Network RPF, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Fake/Pretend Relationship, For Science!, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-31
Updated: 2013-05-31
Packaged: 2017-12-13 08:52:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/822404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strangeallure/pseuds/strangeallure
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen are roommates, friends – and broke. Too bad the psych department is only looking for couples for their current paying experiments. Then again, pretending to be together with your best friend sounds like an easy way to make some cash.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Science Made Us Do It

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the spnspringfling exchange.
> 
> Schlitterbahn and the Velcro experiment are both real – and both worth a try.
> 
> First posted on LJ in June 2011.

Jensen has just drifted off to sleep in front of their new TV when Jared barges into the living room, dropping his bag at the door with a loud thud and striding across the room to loom over the couch, grabbing the remote and pressing the mute button. Jared's cheeks are red from running up the stairs, his breaths drawn a little heavy and he looks like he’s about to burst with excitement.

“I have two words for you.” Jared cocks his head and closes his right eye for a moment the way he often does when he has to rethink something. “No, wait. I have _three_ words for you.” He holds up the three middle fingers of his one hand. “Water. Fun. Park.” His expression reminds Jensen of a little child. A little child that just ate a family pack of Twizzlers.

When Jensen’s confused look doesn’t prompt Jared to clarify, Jensen tries, “Rock? Paper? Scissors?” before he yawns without covering his mouth.

“ _Jensen_ ,” Jared says in a plaintive voice.

“What? You woke me up just now. I’m not fully functioning.”

“You better start function right now because I have _awesome_ news."

Jensen shoots him a skeptical look. "Awesome how?"

" _Schlitterbahn Waterpark Resort_ awesome," Jared looks at him like he expects Jensen to jump up and explode with joy. "The student government planned this trip there for the first weekend in June. Bus ride is free and they got a great deal on tickets. And _I_ ," he points at himself with both his thumbs and makes a goofy face, "signed us up. Because I'm awesome, too. But not as awesome as Schlitterbahn water park."

There's that grin again, the one that makes Jared look all of five years old. The one that makes Jensen agree to all kinds of stupid and irresponsible stuff. The one that made Jensen split the costs of a new TV neither of them could really afford just three weeks ago.

"Jared," Jensen sighs and pulls his wallet out of his back pocket, "I'm sure that park's more awesome than you, but that doesn't change the fact that, unless," he quickly counts the depressingly small number of bills he has left and even goes through the change in the coin compartment, "the tickets cost less than twelve-sixty-eight, I can _not_ afford to go."

"Dude, come on," Jared says. "I'll have to live on Ramen and baked beans for a while, too, but we _have_ to make this work. My family used to go to Schlitterbahn every summer when I was a kid. It's amazing – and huge. Amazingly huge. They have millions of slides and uphill water coasters. _Up-freaking-hill_. And a ride where you can surf. Body board and everything." Jared nods his head more and more enthusiastically with every word, like that toy Bulldog Katie has glued to her dashboard. "And man, they have a ride called Dragon's Revenge. How cool is that?"

Jensen hates when he has to be the one spoiling Jared's fun, but money's tight and he can't always give into Jared's every wish and whim. "It's really cool," he says in a long-suffering monotone, "just like that TV over there,” Jensen nods at the set behind Jared, “and that already cost a hundred more than we had planned on. Or like driving my car. Which I can't, unless I pay my insurance by next Wednesday. And I really like my car."

“So you think you really, really can’t afford the ticket?” There’s a mildly hopeful lilt to Jared’s voice when he tries, “It’s only thirty-five dollars.”

“Twelve-sixty-eight,” Jensen repeats, “and that’s only if I live out of the pantry for the next ten days.”

Jared deflates visibly, letting himself fall onto the couch next to Jensen and nodding his head again, but this time it looks like Jared’s trying to convince himself that this is no big deal.

"Yeah, sure, I'll call them, make them take our names off the list." Maybe it should surprise Jensen that Jared doesn't even seem to consider going alone, but it's just sort of how it is between them. How it's been ever since they got paired up as roommates three years ago.

Jared pulls out his phone and, because he has the attention span of a goldfish sometimes, Jensen sees read through his latest emails first. Jensen's just picked up the remote when he feels the couch shift with the way Jared suddenly sits up straight.

"Jensen, you're a science-minded guy, right?" Jared asks with a suspiciously innocent grin.

\--

Two days later, Jensen’s in a room with Jared and two psych majors and feeling decidedly uncomfortable. At least there are no lab coats, electrodes or straight jackets in sight.

“We’re so glad you agreed to do this on short notice,” a girl in a pale-blue sweater, who introduced herself as Christina, says. “Before we get started, we’ll give you a few minutes to read through the study information sheet.” She hands both him and Jared a print-out. “If you have any questions, just ask.”

The only question Jensen really wants answered right now is how the hell Jared talked him into this. Still, it’s probably good to at least scan the form, just in case they’ve snuck in a passage where he’s pledging his body and soul to science. Turns out his body and soul are mostly safe. All he does agree to is participating in a three-hour research experiment with his _boyfriend_ of at least three months, for which they will be compensated in the amount of twenty dollars each. In other words, he’s pretending to be his best friend’s boyfriend – and thus probably skewing the results of the study – just so they can go to that damn water fun park Jared loved as a kid. Jensen’s such a push-over. He wonders if this technically makes him a criminal, too, swaying a study like that.

Back in their living room, it had all sounded so easy.

“Come on, Jensen. This is easy money. We’ve been friends forever, we spend so much time together. Hell, we’re practically dating already. Just, you know, without all the _you forgot our anniversary_ and the jealousy and the fighting.”

“And without the sex,” Jensen said, deadpan.

“Yeah, that.” Jared hadn't seemed phased. “But still, we probably know each other better than most couples. Just think about it: they desperately need a few more gay couples for their study, don’t you want us to show them that we can be committed and loving and faithful, too?”

“But we’re not,” Jensen pointed out, though he already had a sneaking suspicion that he was fighting a losing battle.

“But we could be. I’m a great boyfriend. You’re a great boyfriend. Too bad the guys around here are mostly assholes.” There was a pleading note in Jared’s voice, and even though Jensen knew that it was Jared’s _please let me get what I want_ voice, it still got to him a little. “Do you want to risk being represented by assholes like that? Like Ryan or Spencer?”

Technically, it was a low blow to bring up Jensen’s lying scumbag of an ex, but since Jared had brought his own psycho nightmare with Ryan up, too, Jensen hadn't call him on it, but let Jared go on talking.

Which was what had ultimately gotten him into this mess.

Once they've gone through the study info, Christina leads Jensen to a different room while Jared and the other psych guy, Owen, stay back.

Jensen has to fill out a few questionnaires with some general questions about himself, has to rate how much he agrees with each of a long list of statements and has to pick answers about a set of short scenarios. When he’s done, Christina offers him a glass of water and then opens a cabinet behind him and takes out a glove with some wires attached to it.

“Next up,” she explains, “I’d like to talk to you about your relationship with Jared, just some general questions about how you’ve met and got together and so on.” That strange glove is still in her hand as she comes to stand in front of him. “I’d like you to wear this while we chat.” Her smile is small, but seems genuine. “It won’t hurt, I promise. It’s just to measure the conductance of your skin.”

Half of Jensen wants to ask what that means, but the other half doesn’t even want to know. “Okay,” he says, his mouth a little dry, and lets her slide the glove over his hand.

Stay calm, he tells himself. Jared and he had talked about this.

“Just tell them the truth,” Jared had said. “We met as freshmen, hit it off and have been inseparable ever since.”

“But what if they ask details? Why did we get together? How? When?” Jensen had swallowed uncomfortably. “I don’t think I can do this.”

Jared had just patted his back for a moment. “Of course you can do this. The reason we got together is that we’re both great guys and handsome devils,” he shot Jensen a grin. “And time-wise, we got together ...” Jared's voice trailed off as he thought about it and he pursed his lips. “How about after Christmas? You haven’t gotten laid since Halloween, right?”

"Hey," Jensen huffed indignantly, and Jared held up his hands in defense. “Don’t get mad. It’s not like I have either. I just mean, if we want to stay as close to the truth as possible, we should probably not have slept with other people since we ‘got together’.” Jared had made actual air quotes.

“Okay,” Jensen had said, somewhat mollified, “after Christmas. But why, and how?”

“You gave me that awesome present, remember?” And yeah, of course Jensen remembered how he hung up fliers on every bulletin board on campus to find someone to repair Jared’s broken iPod and then filled it with music and movies and _Arrested Development_ episodes – and yeah, okay, the _Twilight Saga_ audiobooks. The call Jensen had gotten on Christmas morning – even now it amazed Jensen that Jared possessed the willpower to wait that long to open his presents – with Jared sounding so surprised and happy had made up for all the time Jensen had spend scouring his other friends’ hard drives to find stuff Jared would like but didn’t already have.

“So when I came back to Austin, I took you out to dinner and told you that I realized I wanted to be more than friends,” Jared had said, his voice curiously serious before his trademark grin took over again. “And you said _Yes_ and we’ve been together ever since.”

Jensen had actually remembered that dinner, too. Cactus Blossom and perfectly juicy, melt-off-the-bone ribs at the Texas Roadhouse. No indie cred at all, but so good Jensen wants to die a little each time. “You think it’s that simple?”

“Sure it is,” Jared had said, “just stick to the truth. Every time we go see a movie, it’s a date. When I reheat the food my mom stacks in the freezer when she comes to Austin and we eat at home, it’s a romantic dinner. When you visited me in San Antonio, it was for love, not just for the free tickets to the Spurs my brother gave us.” Jared had had this _duh_ expression on his face, like everything was so obvious. “I mean, it’s not like they will ask about our sex life. The study’s about couples and commitment and stuff.” He leaned back on the couch, hands folded behind his head and a broad smile on his face. “Also: you going to all that trouble to give me the perfect present that makes me realize we belong together - that's got to be one of the _most adorable_ getting together stories ever.”

Jensen hadn't really been able argue with that.

Turns out that it’s really a lot easier to answer the questions than Jensen thought. He follows Jared’s advice, and everything just seems to fall into place. It feels so natural to list all the things they do together and how they support and help each other out. And when Christina asks him to talk about their relationship, what attracted him to Jared and what Jared's character is like, Jensen just has to tell her what a loyal friend Jared is, how he looks out for others and how his enthusiasm seems to balance the way Jensen’s a little too cautious sometimes, how being with Jared makes Jensen try and enjoy new things. Distantly, Jensen wonders if Jared gets asked the same questions and if it’s that easy for him, too.

When the interview’s done, they head back to the other room, where Jared is waiting while Owen is rolling out some gym mats. It seems a strange thing to do, but then Jared looks up at Jensen and smiles widely, and Jensen can’t say for sure if Jared's smiles have always felt like this. In any case, he smiles back, Jared's presence making him more relaxed almost instantly.

“Now it’s time for something a little more active,” Owen says and claps his hands together.

“And fun,” Christina adds in an unaffected tone that seems designed to cancel out Owen's enthusiasm. “Don’t forget the fun part.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t,” Owen says and Jensen’s almost sure he winks at her.

Before they know it, Jared and Jensen are strapped together by Velcro tape around one wrist and ankle respectively and Christina places a foam obstacle in the middle of the room before she hands them a large pillow.

“Okay, we want you both to get on hands and knees, crawl up to the obstacle, climb over it, crawl to the other side of the room, turn around, then back to the obstacle, climb over it again, and return right here.” There’s a gleam in Christina’s eyes, and Jensen has a feeling that she’s enjoying this for non-scientific reasons.

“You also have to support the pillow between your bodies through it all,” Owen adds. “That means no hands, no arms, no teeth.”

“I always hated PE,” Jensen mutters close to Jared’s ear.

Christina must have heard him anyway. “The good news is that you only have sixty seconds to do it, so it’ll be over fast,” she says.

As soon as they have the pillow pressed between their bodies, she shouts, “Ready. Set. Go.”

It’s a close call a couple of times because it’s such a weird – and ridicoulous – thing to do, but they’re still pretty fast, Jensen thinks. When one of them missteps, the other instantly makes up for it - and in what feels like no time at all, they climb over the obstacle a second time and run to where Christina and Owen are waiting.

Owen clicks his watch and says, “You guys made it. Congratulations.”

And Jensen doesn’t know how it happens, but when he looks back from Owen to Jared, Jared’s face is close and flushed and smiling and then he’s kissing Jensen, just a quick peck, his mouth skimming Jensen’s lower lip for just a moment. And for a split second, Jensen thinks that it's just pretend to better sell their act, but when he sees the expression on Jared’s face, fond and a little scared, Jensen realizes that's not it at all.

Before he can chicken out, Jensen slides his one hand that is not Velcro’ed to Jared’s up and around Jared's neck and pulls him into a real kiss.

They have some talking to do later, some things to figure out, but somehow, Jensen is one hundred percent sure that it's all going to work out.


End file.
